Firebirdlifecoach's Blog

Pursuing a Passionate Life

Giving Thanks November 23, 2014

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I am lucky, and yes, grateful that one of my signature strengths is: gratitude. For those of you who may not know what signature strengths are the term comes from the work of psychologists, Martin Seligman and Christopher Peterson who identified and then quantified twenty-four Character Strengths that we all possess, that are consistent over time and across cultures and which we all value. The “VIA” or Values in Action Survey of Character Strengths, is the test that you can easily take if you are interested as it is available online at no cost. The survey will rank order the 24 Character Strengths that Peterson and Seligman identified, and highlight your “Top Five” Signature Strengths. The test, which I use regularly in my coaching practice, is a powerful tool for self-discovery, focusing on the positive and providing a vehicle for numerous applications which we can use to increase our sense of life satisfaction.

For more information or to take the test, go to: https://www.authentichappiness.sas.upenn.edu/home.

So, gratitude is one of my top five. And while I would have to say that I am aware of the daily appearance of all of my strengths as I navigate my day to day life, gratitude is more like the lens through which I see everything. I notice the things I am grateful for all of the time; the deliciousness of a warm cup of coffee, the opportunity to work with all of my wonderful clients, having a comfortable home for myself and my boys, the color of the sky, the coziness of my bed, and on and on and on. It makes me humbled, it makes me feel blessed, it fosters respect, encourages me to keep working and when life’s challenges challenge me… it helps me to keep perspective and be more optimistic. I am in fact, grateful to be grateful, and it’s as simple as that.

So this year, as those of us here in “the States”, gather around dining room tables on Thursday to share a meal with friends and family we will all most likely take a moment to “give thanks”. We will reflect on our blessings and good fortune, and take some time to think about those who have been challenged by all manner of sacrifice and struggle. And collectively, our hearts will open a bit, the “good will meter” will register a little higher and a little more humanity will fill the space between us. And for that we should all be grateful.

My challenge to you this holiday season is to hold on to that perspective a bit: to look with kindness on one another, to treat each other with respect, to listen, to give and to allow yourself to receive and to be grateful for all of the big and small things that happen in our lives every day. There is so much to be grateful for, at the very least, we are still here, we are still breathing and that means we still have the chance to do great things, even of the smallest kind.

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Happy Thanksgiving with Deep Gratitude –

Lisa

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Harvesting the Holiday Heart November 27, 2013

TurkeyTomorrow is Thanksgiving, and all across the country families and friends will gather together to enjoy a traditional meal accented with turkey and pie and various other special foods. And at some point likely they will “give thanks”, because in many ways that is what this holiday is all really about. While doing so – likely people will also reflect on those who are not with them this year, and those who are alone on this holiday or are for one reason or another less fortunate to be able to celebrate in the same way. On the news; you hear stories about celebrity athletes bringing pies to local food pantries, church and community collections to gather a variety of items to distribute to those who otherwise would not have a turkey this year. This time of year, when the temperatures drop, and while men and women are deployed overseas in the services, and the general populace is thinking not only about shopping and cooking and decorating – one can predict an up-tick in the expressions of gratitude and generosity. It’s a good thing.

And while I don’t want to throw a damper on what is truly a great expression of our humanity – I can’t help but find myself thinking about where this spirit goes during the rest of the year. After all, those who are in need and alone and the many gifts for which we are grateful on the holidays don’t magically appear on Thanksgiving and disappear on the first day of the New Year.

Back in 2001, after the tragedies of September 11th, for a while, it seemed that people were kinder to one another. There was a sense of a community drawn together in mourning and grief that in the horror of the moment were able to look at one another through a different lens than they had before – a lens of interconnectedness. There was a sense of shared humanity, of gratitude for life itself and of deep caring not just for those in our immediate lives but for the broader community. Is life such that we are only drawn together in this way in moments of great tragedy and of shared tradition?

My wish this holiday season is that we connect with this part of ourselves in a more enduring and constant way, that we appreciate all of the little blessings that we have in our lives and that we look upon one another through our hearts and not just our minds. So do your holiday thing; give thanks, donate, volunteer, remember and cherish – be fully grateful for the breath you draw today. And then tomorrow, when you are back on the highway during rush hour, when you are standing in line at the department store and impatiently rushing to finish your errands – use those eyes to see the elderly person who is driving slowly in front of you, the economically stretched parent who is paying for his child’s clothes with a pile of coupons and the co-worker who stands by your desk to chat too long each morning. If you can do it for a day, or a season, you can do it every day. Peace, happiness and gratitude to you and yours this Thanksgiving.