Firebirdlifecoach's Blog

Pursuing a Passionate Life

Resolve to Achieve Goals January 6, 2014

Filed under: Uncategorized — firebirdlifecoach @ 11:58 am
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Happy New YearIt’s the beginning of a New Year and for many folks that means it’s time for “New Year’s Resolutions”. You know what resolutions are, they are those promises you make to undertake some sort of self-improvement or other benevolent or positive task of one sort or another. What you may not know is that I am “not a fan” of the whole New Year’s Resolution phenomenon. This may seem counter-intuitive since I am a coach and all, and my work is deeply rooted in supporting my clients in their personal and professional goals. But to me, resolutions are a bit of a recipe for failure. There is shallowness to them in my mind, a thought without a plan, and a wish without a vision. In fact, according to Wikipedia – “A 2007 study by Richard Wiseman from the University of Bristol involving 3,000 people showed that 88% of those who set New Year resolutions fail, despite the fact that 52% of the study’s participants were confident of success at the beginning.” Not the greatest of odds really.

That said, I am a big fan of setting goals and I do think that the beginning of a new year is a great time to start. While in all honesty, I believe one can be successful with starting work on their goals at any time of the year there is a “psychological” boost that a new year offers that primes us for a “fresh start”. So, what’s the big difference? Is this just a matter of semantics here? I don’t think so.

While a resolution may carry within it the necessary spark to get the fire burning, a goal provides the shelter for the flame, the kindling, the firewood and the purpose. Goals if they are to be successful require more thought and planning in order to be properly executed. They require; a roadmap along the way, a vision, sub-goals, supports and encouragements, a strategy for obstacles and distractions, awareness, a system to check, recheck and reevaluate along the way and accountability. Goals have meat on their bones that can make them strong enough to withstand the elements; where in my mind resolutions only provide the skeletal framework. As a life coach, this belief is very much a part of what I do when I am working with my clients.

Yep, sometimes like with resolutions, we do not meet our goals. Sometimes we abandon “Plan A” and move on to “Plan B”. Life is like that and though at times it can be unpleasant, we can often survive and even move forward more successfully with fresh lessons learned making our experience more successful. So if you have made a New Year’s Resolution this year, don’t let me rain on your parade as I do truly offer you my best wishes for success. Use the fresh start of the New Year – it’s a little gift from the universe to get you thinking in a positive direction AND consider going deeper, fleshing out the details of your dreams, creating a goal that you will be meaningful for you and taking all the steps necessary to ensure your success.

And… If you would like to speak to a coach to help you along the way? I may know someone who would be honored to join you on your journey.

 

Oh Those Mice November 4, 2013

Filed under: Uncategorized — firebirdlifecoach @ 5:58 pm
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mouse“The best laid plans of mice and men often go awry.”

Yes, that’s the kind of day it has been, she says, glancing over at the long “to-do” list by her side with only half its items crossed off. I may have been overly ambitious this morning when I pulled from the list of projects that I was working on, a sub-list of thirteen items that I wanted to do today. But honestly, I think I knew when the day began, that this was likely more than I would be able to accomplish.

Though at the top of my page, I had confidently written “Monday”, I never really expected to get everything done. Really, it was more of a priority list, than a “to-do” list, these were the tasks that I knew needed to be attended to, (for a variety of reasons) before anything else, and though when I started writing this post, I was feeling rather dismayed to see so many things things still awaiting my attention – the fact that I got eight of them crossed off was in actuality, a pretty good go.

Whether our efforts are “successes or failures” is really a matter of perspective, isn’t it? Sure it would have been lovely to have had everything crossed off by now, but it was in fact, still a very productive day. And… I’m not done yet. In addition to the fact that I hadn’t really expected myself to finish everything today, I had also planned to work late tonight, so actually, I really am not finished yet. Sure, there will likely be carryover tomorrow, but I know what my next tasks are and I will come back to them for awhile after dinner. And when I am ready to call it a day, then I will do just that.

I am not a big proponent of celebrating each miniscule milestone in our lives; I don’t think it’s necessary to congratulate ourselves for doing the things that we are responsible for at every moment. But I also don’t think it is necessary to give ourselves a hard time, when we have done our best but still have more to do. Because really the most that any of us can ever do, in almost every circumstance, is to do our best in the given environment in which we find ourselves. Life is messy, plans change, and things don’t always go in a linear fashion – but give yourself credit for gettin’ in there and working it.

At least, I can now cross “write blog” off my list and I have a head start on tomorrow’s agenda! Peace-out, peeps – be gentle with your selves.

 

Sea Tales October 5, 2011

Filed under: Uncategorized — firebirdlifecoach @ 7:30 am
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The days sure are full, aren’t they? Countless numbers of tasks, calls, errands and responsibilities to attend to  at any given moment await your attention. Which items get to rise to the top of the list, and which will sink down into the silt at the bottom of the pool, waiting for their chance to rise again to the surface. Swimming through the quagmire of responsibilities can often leave you feeling a bit lost at sea – with the shoreline always up ahead on the horizon. You’re tired, would like to flip over on your back and just float a bit – but knowing if you do so you will be washed further away from the shore. So, what choice do you really have? Keep moving forward or get washed out to sea.

Every day we are faced with choices – that pull us in all directions – and the decision is ours about how we want to address them or not. It isn’t easy – some days the best decision is to rest a bit – to indulge yourself a little, take a walk, a nap and a break. There is only so much energy there to draw from and when your body, mind and spirit are telling you that you need some time to replensih – it is important to listen to that pull. But once you have rested a bit – you have to dive back in. Because if you don’t do it – noone else is going to magically step in and do it for you. It’s your life – you are steering this vessel, where do you want to land? Focus in on that final landing place – what are you after – where are you trying to go – what is important to you and who are you doing this for? Holding on to the vision of your own personal goals and aspirations is key. Because the only way to get to where you are going is to know where you are headed.

Once you have your end goals in mind, decide how you want to get there, what needs to get done to reach the markers along the way and let yourself be fueled by your own vision. It’s okay to ask for help along the way. Having someone like a coach to help you articulate your plans, hold on to your vision, and weather the storms along the voyage can be a great tool. Because at the end of the day – the accomplishment is yours, and ultimately getting to the goal is never a task done totally in a vaccum. But the real key – is to keep moving forward even if ironically sometimes that means staying still, look around you and use the resources at your disposal, hold the hope and the vision for where you are headed as a treasure and find in it the fuel you will need to keep you going, cause when you get there, ahhhhh Paradise.