Firebirdlifecoach's Blog

Pursuing a Passionate Life

Sweet Thing November 10, 2013

Filed under: Uncategorized — firebirdlifecoach @ 7:49 pm

violetsLast night, one of the dearest people that I have known in my lifetime, passed from this world into the next. At the tender age of 96, Aunt Violet slipped peacefully away to join her sister, my Aunt Emma who had died earlier this year at 97, and her other family members who she had missed for so many years. The two had never married, and had lived together almost their entire lives, except for a couple of years when they were in their twenties and Aunt Emma was away at school and Aunt Violet was working as a nanny. They have been a constant presence in my life from my earliest childhood until now, though in recent years I saw them rarely because of distance and life responsibilities, but hardly a day went by when I didn’t think of them.

I have written about them here before, and honestly I don’t feel much like writing right now, except that I just want to acknowledge a couple of things about these two women who meant so very much to me. I am sincerely grateful, that I had so many years of my aunts in my life. Though we may not have seen eye to eye on some topics they were always there for me. They taught me so many things about life, and I could go on and on with stories and happy memories of times spent with them over the years. It’s funny, to even think of one without the other, and I am sure that these last few months were difficult for Aunt Violet. But she was strong and quiet and resolved.

In her younger years, she had a flare for dressing in beautiful suits and bright red lipstick. She was the easier of the two to get along with, never liking disagreements, and always quick to laugh. Sweet, generous and loving… I can hear her laugh.

I will miss her terribly and am glad for her that she has moved on. So lucky to have had her as my dear, sweet aunt, I will miss her. The love that I feel for these two women, will be with me every day. Rest and peace, sweet Aunt Violet, say hello to Aunt Emma for me.


Making the Space November 9, 2013

Filed under: Uncategorized — firebirdlifecoach @ 5:02 pm
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G4Currently, the majority of my waking hours have been spent trying to gear-up for one big event that will be happening a week from now. And though my days are full with the full spectrum of “life stuff” – the majority of my time these last few weeks have been focused on tasks and projects for the Natural Living Expo where I will be both an exhibitor and a presenter next week. I am excited that it is close at hand and that soon I will be out of preparation mode and into doing mode. I am almost done with just a few little loose ends to tie up. Yay!

I won’t drag you through the list of projects I have been consumed with – but let it suffice to say that there was a smattering of everything; designing, writing, planning, coordinating, budgeting, practicing, scheduling, etc. etc. etc. And while the rest of my life has been equally busy, with home and work, this one effort has had most of my attention.

So yesterday, when I realized that I had completely forgotten to write a blog post for Thursday, I was not really that surprised, though I was a bit sad about it. And then when, yesterday became enwrapped with other activities, I missed that post, too. So, today, despite the fact that I am feeling exhausted, and not like I have a whole lot to say, I wanted to make sure that I found at least a small window of time to write. After all, I think that’s really what the whole NaBloPoMo and NaNoWriMo thing is all about, isn’t it? At its most fundamental level it is about making the time in your life, to write (either a blog – in the former case, or a novel – in the latter).

I don’t know what motivates all writers – but I would hazard a guess that for most of us, this is more than just a simple desire, it is a need. If I don’t write, it feels like something is missing for me. Though lately, I have found many forums in which to exercise this need, my blog had become neglected, and the challenge that NaBloPoMo presented offered me an excuse to re-invigorate it. And though I feel like, I am just exercising my creaky old bones at this point; I am starting to get the hang of it again.

So much of the time, so many things come down to us simply needing to make the room in our lives for the things we love; the things that make us feel whole, the things that bring us joy, the things that make us – us. I know this lesson, but I still forget at times. While I am enjoying all of the projects I am working on and feel most sincerely fortunate that I am positively rewarded by so much of what I do – it’s important to make room for a diversity of experience at times. Today, I made the space. I hope you too find a moment or several to do something that speaks to your needs and desires as this little respite has for me.

Until tomorrow… (She says, knocking on wood!)


My Day End Entry November 6, 2013

Filed under: Uncategorized — firebirdlifecoach @ 9:22 pm

(I am not quite sure what’s going on tonight – but I don’t seem able to add a picture or any tags to my post. So we will just have to go as is, ’cause I really can’t spend anymore time tryingto figure out what’s happening here. )

It is 9:00 PM and though what I would really like is to shut off my computer and putter downstairs to settle in for a little mindless relaxation – I first need to write this blog.

It’s funny, when midday on November 1st, I first learned about National Blog Posting Month (NaBloPoMo) I thought, “Oh, too bad that’s happening this month, because I have way too much on my plate at the moment to even consider doing it.” But it got in there, like a little “brain-worm”, working away at me. After all, I have been thinking for the last few months, that I really have been neglecting my blog, and more than that, I missed it. As I had mentioned a couple of days ago, I find a “freedom” in this forum, which I do not necessarily have in the other areas in which I write. In theory, here, I can write about anything I want, and I like that. I made a promise to myself that I want to do this, and apparently it is important to me, or I wouldn’t be here. A little external motivation mixed with a little internal commitment, seems to be just the combination I needed. Thank-you to whoever came up with this idea – it’s nice to be participating even if I don’t always know where I am going to go with it.

So, uninspired as this may sound, for tonight, all I really want to say is that it has been an unusual day and I am in need of some “down-time” for my brain. My day started off with a 7:45 AM coaching appointment, which went very well. Later I had several meetings, all of which were thought provoking and engaging but which took longer than I had anticipated. The rest of my time between appointments was spent trying to feverishly complete tasks that were on my “to-do” list, but most of the bigger items will still be waiting for me tomorrow.

In the afternoon, I had a wonderful appointment to have some polarity work done and I floated out of the office into my car and back home – to make dinner, do laundry and get to some “catch-up” work. And now, my mind and body are crying out for a little quiet. It was a good day, just kind of intense and surprising in many ways, and though I didn’t get a lot of things that I had expected to get done completed, it was very satisfying – in some mystical and mysterious way.

So, I am going to shut-down now. Wishing you all a peaceful evening that fits your needs at the moment, and I will see you again tomorrow.


I’ll get to it in a minute… November 5, 2013

Filed under: Uncategorized — firebirdlifecoach @ 9:15 pm
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wristwatchSo, what do you think procrastination is all about?

People (and I’m not naming any names here) who do it, know that they do it, often see it as a problem and do it anyway. They aren’t proud of it. It often makes them feel uncomfortable and yet they repeat the same patterns over and over again, forcing themselves into situations where they are left trying to complete projects at the last minute, often under a great deal of stress and occasionally at a sub-par level due to time constraints.

Just thinking about it makes my anxiety rise. It’s like when you think about having a dentist, drill your teeth for fillings. It just isn’t pleasant.

We’ve all procrastinated at one point or another, it’s probably more common a phenomenon than not – though I suppose that there are some people who do it much less than others.

Maybe it’s all in the anticipation. After all, people don’t really have a big issue procrastinating about things that they want to do. Procrastination is more typically reserved for unpleasant or arduous tasks, sometimes big things and sometimes very small.

Maybe some people really do, do their best work when they feel the urgency of a looming deadline.

Maybe it’s a way of taking control of circumstances in your life that are less favorable. Or maybe it’s a way of abdicating your role in the control that you do have in a given situation.

Maybe if your past experience tells you that you can wait until the last minute to do something and still receive the outcome you desire, there is some positive reinforcement for putting things off.

It’s a funny thing, procrastination. It’s pretty pervasive, often counterproductive, and surprisingly seductive all at the same time. I don’t have any big “answers” here tonight – I am just thinking “out-loud” a bit. The subject of procrastination keeps coming up in conversations that I have had with a number of folks over the last few weeks. It’s not an uncommon topic. And I do believe it can be “overcome” if that in fact, is your goal. But it’s still tricky.

In ways, I think procrastination is the evil cousin, of savoring. Maybe people who are procrastinators are better at living in the moment? That can’t be all bad. Is it?

It’s complicated. And for tonight I am not going to try to tie this up into a neat little package. I’m just going to put it out there, let you think about it a little bit if you want. Do you think of yourself as a procrastinator? Are there some things that you are more likely to procrastinate about than others? When you finally take action after procrastinating for a while about something, what gets you to move into action?

Maybe it’s one of those things that is worth thinking about sometimes, not to make yourself feel badly about it, but to decide how it effects you, what you get from it, and how you best deal with it? Maybe not, you decide.


Oh Those Mice November 4, 2013

Filed under: Uncategorized — firebirdlifecoach @ 5:58 pm
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mouse“The best laid plans of mice and men often go awry.”

Yes, that’s the kind of day it has been, she says, glancing over at the long “to-do” list by her side with only half its items crossed off. I may have been overly ambitious this morning when I pulled from the list of projects that I was working on, a sub-list of thirteen items that I wanted to do today. But honestly, I think I knew when the day began, that this was likely more than I would be able to accomplish.

Though at the top of my page, I had confidently written “Monday”, I never really expected to get everything done. Really, it was more of a priority list, than a “to-do” list, these were the tasks that I knew needed to be attended to, (for a variety of reasons) before anything else, and though when I started writing this post, I was feeling rather dismayed to see so many things things still awaiting my attention – the fact that I got eight of them crossed off was in actuality, a pretty good go.

Whether our efforts are “successes or failures” is really a matter of perspective, isn’t it? Sure it would have been lovely to have had everything crossed off by now, but it was in fact, still a very productive day. And… I’m not done yet. In addition to the fact that I hadn’t really expected myself to finish everything today, I had also planned to work late tonight, so actually, I really am not finished yet. Sure, there will likely be carryover tomorrow, but I know what my next tasks are and I will come back to them for awhile after dinner. And when I am ready to call it a day, then I will do just that.

I am not a big proponent of celebrating each miniscule milestone in our lives; I don’t think it’s necessary to congratulate ourselves for doing the things that we are responsible for at every moment. But I also don’t think it is necessary to give ourselves a hard time, when we have done our best but still have more to do. Because really the most that any of us can ever do, in almost every circumstance, is to do our best in the given environment in which we find ourselves. Life is messy, plans change, and things don’t always go in a linear fashion – but give yourself credit for gettin’ in there and working it.

At least, I can now cross “write blog” off my list and I have a head start on tomorrow’s agenda! Peace-out, peeps – be gentle with your selves.


Fall Back AND Forth November 3, 2013

Sunrise behind fragile-looking winter treesAhhh, fall and the end of daylight savings time…
I actually remembered this year, and before going to sleep last night, took the time to set back the clocks around the house. This meant, theoretically, that last night we would get an extra hour of sleep, (the only upside to this day that comes readily to mind). Unfortunately for me, the one clock I forgot to change was my internal one, so not only did I wake up early today, but I woke up earlier than I would have on any other “normal” Sunday. My day began at 5:30 AM.
This year the shift in the clocks, also coincided with a major shift in the temperature overnight, so we woke to a very chilly, gray and rainy morning in the 30’s. Brrrr! The fact that both of things happened on the same evening – really drove home the realization that fall is fast disappearing and winter is right around the corner. While I don’t dread this season as much as many folks do, I do find that I enjoy it less than I used to. I am beginning to understand why so many folks when they reach their retirement years, fly off to warmer climates. For me however, the single thing that I dislike the most is not the cold, but the lack of sunlight.
So given that the we are in the waning part of the daylight story, and that I am not even close to retirement, I guess I have a couple of choices: begin hibernation mode or make the best of it. Thus, today as I mentally prepare for the fading light and colder days, these are the things I want to remember about winter:
• I love to snuggle under the covers, when it is cold outside
• I enjoy making and eating “winter foods” such as; soups, stews, and other hearty hot meals.
• There is nothing quite as exquisite as a fresh covering of snow: twinkling in the moonlight, shining against the blue sky in the morning and cloaking everything in a dreamlike silence.
• Winter brings some of my favorite family traditions.
• It’s a great time of year for indoor projects and activities; artwork, writing, reading, having friends to dinner.
• The air feels crisp and clean.
• And winter is always followed by spring!
As my morning shifts into these reframed thoughts, I recognize that I can indeed feel a shift. I am excited to have written this blog. I have already gotten an hour of work in this morning on a couple of quiet projects. I am excited to make the beef stew, I was planning for dinner. And at some point, I am going to crawl back into bed for a little nap. It’s all good. Silly me… I forgot for a moment there that each season brings its gifts along with its challenges. Just like every aspect of our lives. I hope you find the upside in whatever may be vexing you on this Sunday morning, sometimes all it requires is a little reset of your own internal clock.


Lift Off! November 2, 2013

Filed under: Uncategorized — firebirdlifecoach @ 7:06 pm
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ApolloI just watched the movie, Apollo 13, for about the 100th time. It’s one of those films that whenever I see it is on, I feel completely compelled to watch it again. There are only a handful of films that I feel that way about, and in this case though I think it is a good movie, I know it is the subject matter that draws me in rather than the film itself. The magnitude of the malfunction and the amazing ingenuity which enabled them to work through multiple solutions to get those astronauts home again was really quite extraordinary. When you think about it, that happened 43 years ago, and the technology was so much less evolved, but it worked, and it was incredible.

I think my fascination with the Apollo missions is a generational thing. My sons for instance, do not share my sense of wonder and amazement. In fact it is a running joke whenever we look for a movie to watch together – that someone will bring up Apollo 13, and I am the only taker. Years ago, I became engrossed in a book by Andrew Chaikin about the history of the Apollo space program called, A Man on the Moon. It was an amazing time in our history and reading about it in detail was enthralling to me. The whole idea is magical.

Growing up in the 60’s and 70’s, I remember watching the launches on funky old television sets, which were wheeled in to our classes in elementary school. Every little boy in class wanted to be an astronaut, though sex roles being as they were at the time, I don’t remember feeling like that was an option for me or any of the other little girls in my class. Nonetheless, the missions were big news at the time, in a world less “informed, exposed and aware” as we are today, so the space program took on a special significance.

This evening, when my sixteen year old son wandered through as I was watching the end of the movie he made the comment that “the space program was a waste of money and that we really didn’t learn anything important from it.” Ugh… I couldn’t elaborate on the scientific discoveries which came out of it specifically, beyond the development of technology and engineering that allowed such missions to take place and whatever was learned about the moon itself. But I also believe that exploration for its own sake is valuable. How do we know, what we do not know if we do not undertake the mission to find out?

Our curiosity and quest for knowledge and understanding is to me one of the best things about human beings. Despite the extreme expense of the space program, I am still a fan. I guess my sons don’t want to grow up to be astronauts, and I will still be watching that movie alone in years to come, but I value the inspiration it stirs in me and the awed I feel when reminded about the incredible things humans are capable of when they put their minds to it.


I Accept! November 1, 2013

Filed under: Uncategorized — firebirdlifecoach @ 6:31 pm
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BlogI just learned from my friend and fellow blogger that this is “National Blog Posting Month (NaBloPoMo)”. And since I have been very neglectful of my blog-writing in recent months, I thought, “Okay, I will give it a go.” In many ways, this month really couldn’t be a busier one for me as I have many projects that I am in the midst of, but sometimes a little external pressure even if it is self-imposed can be just the kick in the pants you need to get you going. Besides, I miss blogging, I truly do. There is something about this forum that I find particularly forgiving and pleasing.

Lately, my writing pursuits have taken on different forms. I am still writing articles for a few online publications about divorce – which is great. I also have written a chapter to be included in a collection about divorce. I have been working on planning, outlining, writing and designing several new groups which I am offering. I have written an hour-long presentation about “Exploring Your Life’s Passions” that I will be presenting at a very large health and wellness expo in a couple of weeks. And I have just completed the final of three EBooks which I will be offering on my website shortly. All, very exciting…

Nonetheless, there is something about blogging, the free-form nature of the experience that I have missed while my writing tasks have taken me in these other directions. So, we shall see how this all pans out. Right now, I am trying to squeeze this post in before my evening plans begin and likely that may be how a lot of them work their way into my schedule over the next month – but who knows? I am excited about the possibility of maybe writing in different ways… we shall see.

I accept the NaBloPoMo challenge! Here’s hoping that the fruit it bears tastes sweet!